Resistance to Being Fully Present

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Presence2
People initially approach me with an enthusiasm saying that they want to heal. That enthusiasm often disappears as soon as the underlying feelings and issues that are the source of many of their problems start making their way to the surface. This loss of enthusiasm stems largely from people’s resistance to being present with their feelings, physical bodies and the realities of their everyday lives. This same resistance is what prevents people from gaining awareness, learning from their experiences, growing and healing.

I have watched so many people take a few steps to heal only to have their resistance to being present derail the healing process. Ella has been working as a nutritionist for many years and yet she has always struggled to support herself. The relationship with her partner is very tumultuous at times. Ella and her partner fight like cats and dogs. Her fears of dying have grown along with the range of age related health issues that have emerged in recent years. Ella has been too fearful to go in for a physical exam, despite any concerns she might have for her health and wellbeing.

I would have Ella close her eyes, bring the issues and concerns to the forefront of her awareness, notice what she was feeling within her body and then tell me where the feelings were situated. I then had Ella breathe into the feelings and sensations that arose. People that I work with often tell me how this practice helps them to diffuse and then digest the highly charged emotions that are the source of many of their difficulties. Ella was incredibly resistant to the process and would sometimes say “I hate this!”

Ella had resisted being present for so long that her internal state of being has become a living hell. I told her that she couldn’t possibly experience all of these feelings or go through so much discomfort if she weren’t holding so much toxic drama and emotion within her body. What she hates is being present in her own body, with the feelings contained therein and the realities of her everyday life. Needless to say, Ella’s drama continues.

Most people do not react as Ella did. They may even enjoy the healing process and acknowledge the benefits that they have derived from the individual sessions. Some even rave about the difference the healing sessions have made in their lives, and yet many cannot sustain this level of presence.

Mia was sexually abused as a child and was later abused by the psychiatrist she sought out for treatment. She had so medicated herself into oblivion that one of her friends had to call and schedule the initial appointments. Before long Mia was able to call and schedule her own sessions. With each of the individual session she was developing greater lucidity. Mia began to address the issues pertaining to her finances, her mother’s failing health and it was quite obvious that she was beginning to function better in all areas of her life. I had hopes for Mia after seeing her starting to return to herself, but she would do a few sessions and then disappear for periods time. She would show up months later and then disappear again. I haven’t heard from Mia in quite some time now. The last time I spoke with her, it was evident that she was allowing herself to sink back into her pharmaceutically induced haze.

People like Mia are holding a lifetime of pain, trauma, fear and confusion within their bodies. Matters are further compounded because they lack many of the basic faculties needed to facilitate the healing of these traumas. Traumatic experiences and their corresponding emotional responses alter the biochemical makeup and neurostructure of the brain. The subtle bodies consisting of the chakras and layers of the aura are often damaged and in many instances they fail to fully develop. The combination of these factors can leave survivors of trauma overwhelmed and incapacitated.

The presence working through me during the individual sessions facilitates healing by helping people like Mia to diffuse and then digest the traumas and subsequent layers of emotion. Changes in the structural and biochemical makeup of the brain and the building of the chakras and layers of the aura resulting from the healing sessions make it easier for these individuals to contain and then process their feelings and experiences. Feelings and memories need to be brought to the surface so that healing can take place. The first impulse of many survivors of trauma is to run. The challenge is getting people that who have suffered as a result of traumatic events to remain present to themselves by sticking with the process long enough to build a strong and healthy foundation.

Resistance is inevitable because we learn from such an early age to disconnect from our bodies, our feelings and issues and the realities of our lives that we don’t want to deal with. Our habitual tendency to avoid or resist causes these patterns to become even more deeply ingrained. It is critically important for us to understand that our feelings and the issues we need to be addressing will never just go away. Whatever we fail to process will remain trapped within our bodies and minds. And that will cause our bodies and minds to break down.

We smoke and drink and self-medicate with other recreational drugs. We take pharmaceuticals to numb the pain. We eat way more than our body needs to sustain itself. And we spend hours of the day on Facebook, Instagram and other social media sites and we find innumerable other distractions to take us away from what it is that we don’t want to feel.

The feelings we disconnect from may no longer register within our conscious awareness after some time. Our resistance to being present is what prevents us from becoming fully conscious. To the extent that we’re not being conscious we’re walking around in a state of unconsciousness. The disconnect becomes so great that it leaves us blind and numb to whole bandwidths of our consciousness. The resulting desensitization prevents us from seeing and feeling the implications of our actions upon ourselves, other people and the world in which we live. And that accounts for so much of our craziness individually and collectively as a human species.

We may eat right and exercise. We may even pray, meditate, chant mantras, do Tai Chi, Yoga, Pranayama, go to our preferred house of worship and bow at the guru’s feet and yet we still deny and disconnect from our feelings, avoid the issues and refuse to go to those wounded places within. Prayer, most forms of meditation, yoga and tai chi all benefit us in many ways and yet they’re not going to heal the deep emotional wounds. And no great god from the sky is going to come down and take it all away. We have to become fully present to our issues, the realities of our lives and the subsequent feelings that arise from them.

I was very resistant to the painful feelings that arose in response to the abuses suffered during my childhood and adolescence and the subsequent patterns of abandonment, unrequited love and abusive relationships that began to play out in my adult life. My resistance to what I was feeling reinforced the relational dynamics that were causing me to suffer so terribly. This same resistance is what prevented me from healing. It took me a long time to realize that I could never escape from the pain. I could only go through the middle of it. I taught myself to be fully present to the realities of what wasn’t working in my relationships and all the subsequent feelings attached to them. Breathing into all the feelings and physical sensations began to awaken the innate healing power residing within my body and mind. The pain was transformed. And in the process of doing so it became fuel for growth.

There were many instances where I would start to access my feelings, but my internal resistance would cause me to pop out of them. I had to train myself to remain fully present to my feelings by continually bringing myself back to them whenever my defense mechanisms caused me to jump track. I would breathe into the numbness during those times I couldn’t access my feelings or the stuckness I felt when parts of my life weren’t working.

I have been making a very conscientious effort to become more cognizant of the many areas of life where I am resistant. I do that by teaching myself to pay more attention to the times when I react to people and situations. At other times catch myself complaining about what’s not working, becoming frustrated or angry or trying to control the outcome of a situation.

It is appropriate for us to react when we’re faced with a legitimate threat to our wellbeing. Most situations do not warrant such a strong response. I find that I can respond more appropriately to people, situations and the issues that are of concern to me when I breathe into the feelings that were causing me to react. And then there are other times when I need to let go of any attempt to control or influence and just allow people and circumstances to be as they are.

All kinds of feelings and issues make their way to the surface in response the various practices and interventions that I do. It can feel very uncomfortable at the time these feelings and issues are surfacing, but I always feel a greater sense of aliveness and find that I’m more capable of doing whatever it is that I need to be doing as I work through the feelings and issues. I want as much of this aliveness, presence and power as I can get.

There are times when I felt incredibly resistant while on the vision quest, a traditional Native American healing practice that involves going out to fast alone in the mountains for four days and nights without food or water. The resistance becomes so strong as the powerful forces working on me began to move through my body. I sometimes felt as though I wanted to jump out of my skin. I would become so angry and frustrated as the resistance intensified that I wanted the whole experience to be over with. I finally realized after some time that it was during these times when I felt the most overwhelmed and the most resistant that I was making the greatest breakthroughs. I learned to stop fighting the process by becoming as present as I possibly could in the midst of my discomfort. The breakthroughs I experienced became that much more profound as I learned to become more fully present in this way.

Healing requires courage, commitment and consistency. Healing and personal growth ceases to happen when we stop feeling and addressing our issues and embracing life. The feelings, issues and realities of our daily lives that need to be dealt with can be unpleasant at times, but the only true way forward is to remain fully present to the best of our ability. Facing our issues, dealing directly with life as it unfolds, feeling what we truly feel and making use of the interventions that enable us to facilitate the aspects of our healing process that we cannot fully do on our own make it possible for us to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

©Copyright 2015 Ben Oofana. All Rights Reserved. This content may be copied in full, with copyright, creation and contact information intact, without specific permission.

Ben Oofana is a healer who began his training with Horace Daukei, one of the last surviving traditional doctors among the Kiowa Indian tribe. Call (913) 927-4281 to learn more or to schedule an individual session.

Creating Your Own Daily Regimen of Healing and Personal Growth

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Discipline
Those who have attained mastery in the various ancient spiritual traditions typically spend two, three, four, six, eight or even more hours of intensive practice a day. You might be thinking “Who has time for that?” Obviously some people do. The concert pianists and the Olympic athletes that many of us admire spend hours a day training. And so do many other people committed to various fields of study and other disciplines.

All of us are unique in that we have different needs and circumstances and that will to a large extent determine the kinds of practices we do, the extent of our commitment and the amount of time we invest.

Parenting can be a full time job, especially for those who are caring for young children. A single parent who is the sole source of support may have very little time to devote to practice. Some of us have considerably more time on our hands.

People in our modern day culture often wonder why anyone would devote so much of their time and energy doing these various forms of intensive practice. There are many reasons. Some do intensive meditation practices to deepen their connection with the higher power. Martial artist will practice in order to develop higher levels of skill. Traditional Native American Indian doctors would continue to go on the vision quest in order to develop a greater range of healing powers. One can also practice to facilitate the healing of the deep emotional wounds and to increase their capacity to love and be loved. The possibilities are endless.

I started working with various practices with the intention of healing the wounds resulting from the traumas of my own childhood and adolescence. A big part of what motivated me was the desire to have someone in my life that I could love and be loved by. Another motivation was the traditional Native American doctors that possessed truly amazing gifts of healing. I’m also motivated by those who have attained mastery in the Internal Martial Arts of Xin Yi Quan and Baguazhang. Through continued practice they developed ever increasing levels of proficiency. I have always felt that we as human beings are far too limited and had a fascination with the paranormal. One of the things that fascinated me most about the various ancient traditions is that those who attain mastery in them often develop paranormal gifts and abilities.

I do hours of intensive practice on a daily basis for the purpose of developing my body and mind. I usually start practicing from the time I get up in the morning. I begin the day with intensive Chi Gong practices to build internal power. I then practice the various forms of Xin Yi Quan. That can take two to three hours.

I usually do the various forms of meditative practice that I developed to help me process whatever is going on in my life for at least an hour a day. I will do more Chi Gong practice if I have additional time. I also spend fifteen to twenty minutes working with some of the mantras that I’ve learned from the Vedic tradition. All this practice takes at least three and a half hours a day, but I see it is as an essential part of the work that I need to do to maintain physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing and to continue to develop as a healer.

Intensive daily practice is a critically important part of healing and personal development and yet I am also very cognizant of the limitations of practicing on my own. I seek out various interventions on a regular basis. I make a point of receiving deep tissue body work at monthly intervals. I usually jump whenever the opportunity to work with a gifted healer presents itself. The problem here is that these individuals are very few and far between in this part of the world. For this reason I have relied heavily upon the vision quest, a traditional Native American healing practice that involves going out to fast alone in the mountains for four days and nights without food or water. It is through the vision quest that many of the traditional Native American doctors developed the gifts and abilities the enabled them to facilitate healing within others. I have been going on the vision quests twice a year for over twenty years now.

I’m only sharing my own regimen as an example. Your own circumstances and needs may vary tremendously from mine. However you do need to be doing some form of intensive practice to develop your body and mind on a daily basis. Failure to do so will invariably lead to stagnation. Those of us who are suffering as a result of past trauma, struggling with depression and anxiety, grieving the loss of a love or caught up in patterns of abandonment and unrequited love especially need to be doing practice on a daily basis to facilitate the healing of the deep emotional wounds.

I recommend that you do at least an hour of practice a day. You need to create your own daily regimen. That could include yoga or some form of martial art, Chi Gong, Pranayama or other forms of meditative practice to mention a few.

We all have emotional responses to the people, situations, circumstances and issues concerning us. We all need to learn to work constructively with our feelings. The practices I teach facilitate this process. Begin by of acknowledging what’s happening in your life. Notice what you feel in response to it. Center your awareness in the part of your body where you experience these feelings. Breathe softly and deeply while immersing your consciousness in the middle of any feelings or bodily sensations that arise. Follow the feelings and sensations as they go through their progression.

Intensive daily practice is an important part of increasing your competency and expanding your range of motion. The adversity you encounter along the way will not be quite so overwhelming or devastating as you develop greater mental, emotional, physical and spiritual resilience. Practice will make it easier for you get over the pain of a breakup and other setbacks. That will enable you to bounce back more readily.

Many of us are suffering from depression, anxiety, emotionally traumatic issues and a wide range of physiological health issues. We need to take some time to explore various practices to determine those that are best for us. Our bodies and minds can heal and our lives can be transformed when we commit to a daily regimen of intensive practice. It’s this commitment to doing what is best for ourselves that will facilitate continued growth and personal development.

©Copyright 2015 Ben Oofana. All Rights Reserved. This content may be copied in full, with copyright, creation and contact information intact, without specific permission.

Ben Oofana is a healer who began his training with Horace Daukei, one of the last surviving traditional doctors among the Kiowa Indian tribe. Call (913) 927-4281 to learn more or to schedule an individual session.

Internal Martial Arts and the Healing of Trauma

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Xin_Yi
Mugging attempts are fairly common in New York City. I was cat sitting for some friends on Avenue A in Manhattan’s East Village in the fall of 2002 when someone attempted to rob me as I was walking along 7th Street. I immediately whipped out pepper spray and chased the attacker down the street. Next thing I knew the police had me up against the wall and were on the verge of taking me to jail for having pepper spray in my possession. I said to one of the officers “What am I supposed to do? Get beaten up because some trash thinks he’s going to mug me?” The officer responded by saying “This is New York. You just have to get used to it.” I thought to myself “Okay, fine …I’m going to go out and find the most ruthless master I can find to train with and next time I’m going to paralyze the son of a bitch.”

I stopped by one of the Martial Arts supply store in Chinatown shortly thereafter and asked the man behind the counter if he had any recommendations as to who I should train with. He then referred me to a rack of flyers telling me to take whatever I wanted. I went home with a whole stack of flyers that evening.

Some of the flyers were very attractive and included glossy photos of Shaolin Monks in all kinds of fighting postures. But there was one flyer printed on dingy looking yellow paper that caught my attention. Sifu Li Tai Liang’s flyer was written in very poor English, but it talked about his training in the Internal Martial Arts of Xin Yi Quan and Baguazhang. I had a knowing as I read the description that this is the person I wanted to train with. I called the next day and went later that evening to Li Shifu’s studio in Corona.

Xin Yi Quan and Baguazhang are highly complex systems of martial arts that require many years of disciplined practice to master. I didn’t feel that I was able to fully grasp what Sifu was teaching in the class setting so I began to train with him privately. Sifu has taught me a vast array of forms and practices since that time.

Sifu started talking to me one day about the Taoist belief that much of the soul does not fully incarnate within the physical body. He then said that intensive practice helps to draw more of the soul into the body. I had heard similar things in my early twenties while I was training with Horace Daukei, the last surviving traditional doctor among the Kiowa Indian tribe.

I had shut down on many levels as a means of coping with the traumas of my own childhood and adolescence. Trauma held within prevented me from being fully present in my body. A number of people commented on the fact that I was very dissociated and that I held a lot of anger and rage in my body. All of that pain finally erupted in my mid-twenties as I found myself involved with women who reenacted the past traumas. The debilitating emotional pain made it very difficult for me to function at times.

The heavy, painful and sometimes overwhelming feelings associated with anxiety, depression and emotionally traumatic issues can have a debilitating impact upon us. These stressful energies and emotions can be very hard on the body. These energies and emotions will in many instances express themselves through the body as some form of disease, illness or injury. One of the things I like about doing Chi Gong practice is that it infuses the body with clean vital life force. This life force has a nourishing and soothing quality that helps to offset the painfully debilitating emotions. The cleansing process that takes place as we draw vital life force into our body – mind also makes it easier for us to process our emotions.

Years later I was engaged to an ethnic Tamil woman from Sri Lanka. I was devastated when the relationship ended in the summer of 2007. I couldn’t really do much of anything else at the time other than breathe for hours with my awareness centered amid the painful feelings of loss. I would then do hours of intensive Chi Gong practices. Working with the pain in this way had the effect of opening doorways within. I began to experience a greater sense of connectedness with the higher power and that left me feeling euphoric at times. It was during that time that I came to a place where my sense of wellbeing did not depend upon another person.

Some people reading this chapter will wonder if intensive martial arts and Chi Gong practice alone will heal trauma. No, it will not. It’s common for people who follow the various spiritual traditions to attempt to bypass the emotional and psychological aspects of their development. People who have attained mastery in the Internal Martial Arts, Chi Gong and in various Yogic disciplines have often acted out in various ways because of their failure to do the ground work necessary to address their issues and deal with their own emotions. This failure to build a strong healthy foundation on an emotional level accounts for much of the dysfunction playing out in various spiritual communities.

Chronic stress has an adverse effect on the brain, especially the hippocampus located near the middle of the brain, which plays a major role in our ability to retain information. The hippocampus facilitates the process of converting new information briefly retained in the prefrontal cortex into working memory. The hippocampus is especially vulnerable to ongoing emotional stress, because of the damaging effects of cortisol. The vast majority of the brain’s production of new neurons and the formation of new neural-connections take place within the hippocampus. The hippocampus loses neurons and shrinks in size when the neurons are flooded with cortisol. Cortisol stimulates the amygdala’s fight or flight reaction, while impairing the hippocampus’ reasoning capabilities. We go into self-preservation mode as our attention is redirected to the reactive survival oriented emotions and that impairs our ability to take in new information. That’s why we tend to forget things when we’re stressed out.

Exercise increases the production of the chemical messengers such as norepinephrine that promote healthy cognitive function, learning and positive emotional states. Exercise also helps to balance our physiology by stimulating our heart rate and improving the quality of our sleep.

I can see that lots of people are still holding all kinds of stressful emotions in their body despite the fact that they work out consistently. This unprocessed emotional baggage is clearly evidenced in the high incidence of digestive disorders, TMJ and other stress related health issues. I have also known dancers and yoga practitioners who had a strong presence and aliveness about them, but were totally neurotic because of their failure to deal with their own issues and emotions.

Doing Chi Gong practices doesn’t mean that all the painful and anxious feelings are just going to go away. One of the things I noticed as I began to work consistently with the various Chi Gong practices is that it made it possible for me to draw the life force into the parts of my body I had disconnected from that were holding a lot of painful emotion, trauma or other stresses. In many instances I find that Chi Gong practice brings the emotions held in the body that I hadn’t been able to access up to the surface so that I can process them. I like the fact that it helps me to get in touch with feelings that would otherwise be difficult to access.

Learning all these highly complex forms encourages the development of new neural pathways. These additional neural faculties also facilitate emotional processing and that makes it easier for us to work through our feelings and bring issues to resolution.

It can be very difficult, if not all together impossible, to process our feelings when we are not fully inhabiting our bodies. Training in the Internal Martial Arts has helped me to become more fully present in my physical body and the world in which I live. The changes that have taken place as a result of my practice are making it easier for me to move through the world with a greater sense of resilience and self-assurance.

One of the things I like most about the Internal Martial Arts such as Xin Yi Quan and Baguazhang is that it incorporates Chi Gong into the fighting forms so that the practitioner is always building the life force within the body. I do lots of Chi Gong practice and find that it nourishes and strengthens the internal organs of my body. I feel cleaner, healthier and a greater sense of resilience.

I encourage anyone to learn and practice any of the Internal Martial Arts. People with physical limitations can easily do Chi Gong and Tai Chi. Those who are more physically able that are up for the challenge can experience even greater benefit by training in disciplines such as Xin Yi Quan and Baguazhang.

I find that Chi Gong practice helps me to access my feelings, but it doesn’t facilitate the actual processing of the feelings. Chi Gong can be a highly valuable healing tool and yet there is no one approach that will address all of our needs. I make much greater progress when I combine various healing practices. I make a consistent effort on a daily basis to do the groundwork needed to build a strong and healthy foundation. A big part of that involves a whole different kind of practice of breathing with my awareness centered in the midst of any feelings and bodily sensations that arise in response to what is taking place in my life. Breathing into the feelings in this way facilitates a process that enables me to digest my life experience and any subsequent feelings that arise.

I have done lots of deep tissue body work and have worked with a number of powerful healers whenever the opportunity presented itself. I have gone on numerous vision quests, which are a traditional Native American healing practice that involves going out to fast alone in the mountains for four days and nights without food or water. It was during the individual healing sessions and vision quests that I could feel the parts of myself that were holding trauma being transformed. It’s the combination of all of these practices that have made it possible come as far along as I have.

©Copyright 2014 Ben Oofana. All Rights Reserved. This content may be copied in full, with copyright, creation and contact information intact, without specific permission.

Ben Oofana is a healer who began his training with Horace Daukei, one of the last surviving traditional doctors among the Kiowa Indian tribe. Call (913) 927-4281 to learn more or to schedule an individual session.

Freeing Ourselves from the Vicious Cycle of Obsessive Thought

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obsessive thoughtsWe can easily fall into patterns of obsessive thought when we’re under a great deal of stress. And when that happens, we tend to go over and over the same thoughts and feelings. Obsessive thinking seldom brings about any true resolution of the matter. Thinking about the matters that are of concern to us is only useful to a certain point and after that we’re only recycling what we’ve already gone over. Circular thinking creates a vicious cycle by causing our anxiety to escalate and that only intensifies our obsessive thought patterns. Circular thinking becomes a trap that keeps us stuck in our heads. We become fixated and that prevents us from going through the internal processes needed to facilitate growth; therefore we continue to cycle through the same dramas.

There are many different levels of activity operating within our minds. Powerful currents of memory, thought and emotion operate beneath the surface of our conscious awareness. These forces are the drivers that create the underlying themes that play out in our lives and shape our personality. And then there are levels of surface thought and feeling that run through our conscious mind. Most people live their lives caught up in the surface drama, but they never really get to the underlying source of what’s driving them.

I make concerted effort to be aware of my own internal processes. I’ll force myself to stop whenever I notice myself going over and over the same thoughts. I then ask myself, “What are the deepest feelings behind all of this drama or mental chatter?” And then I start breathing into any feelings that I can gain access to.

Breathing into the feelings as they arise takes me right to the source of the issues by helping me to access the deeper levels of thoughts and feelings along with the memories of experiences pertaining to any unresolved issues. Pieces start coming together as I begin to recognize the connection between my current situation and the unresolved issues from earlier parts of my life. The greater healing intelligence residing within facilitates a process that enables me to digest these thoughts, feelings and experiences. It also brings consciousness into parts of my psyche that have been playing out limiting or destructive patterns. Continued practice has made me conscious of patterns of behavior that I was previously oblivious to, and has allowed me to change the way that I move through the world.

Breathing into the anxiety and other feelings that lie beneath the anxious mental chatter diffuses the underlying emotional force that fuels obsessive thoughts. It’s important for us to understand that there will still be instances where we find ourselves getting caught up in the dramas unfolding in our lives. We will at times have to refocus our attention on the underlying feelings.

Obsessive thought exists along a continuum. Everyone experiences obsessive thoughts at some time along the way. We sometimes worry about the well-being of friends and family. We obsess about our love interests any time we wait for their call or hope they will reciprocate our feelings or try to figure out why act as they do. Those of us who struggle to get by often worry about whether we will be able to make enough money to make ends meet.

Chronic patterns of obsessive thought often arise in response to the emotional wounding that occurs at various stages in our lives. This wounding is compounded by the fact that we did not possess the understanding or resources necessary to facilitate healing.

Overwhelming or traumatically stressful events can easily elicit powerful emotional states that in turn trigger powerful biochemical reactions within the brain. The combination of powerful emotions and the brains biochemical response often becomes a habituated body-mind reaction that can easily be triggered by situations, people or issues that act as a reminder of the initial traumas or stressful life events.

The practice that I’m sharing with you has been an important part of my healing process. I soon realized that I didn’t possess all the resources I needed to completely heal on my own. I began to work with a number of exceptionally powerful healers whenever the opportunity presented itself. And then I began to go on the vision quest, a traditional Native American practice that involves going out to fast alone in the mountains for four days and nights without food or water. It was during the vision quests that I healed and developed the gifts that have made it possible for me to facilitate healing in others.

The presence working through me during the individual healing sessions does a “reset” of the entire body-mind system. The emotional triggers associated with obsessive thought are dismantled and replaced with newer healthier models that facilitate more adaptive and resourceful responses to life’s challenges. You will become much calmer and develop a more grounded presence as the highly charged emotions fueling your obsessive thoughts are diffused and then digested. New resources begin to emerge that will enable you to become far more effective in all areas of your life. You will also develop the capacity to relax and let go when needed so that you can better flow with life as it unfolds.

©Copyright 2013 Ben Oofana. All Rights Reserved. This content may be copied in full, with copyright, creation and contact information intact, without specific permission.

Ben Oofana is a healer who began his training with Horace Daukei, one of the last surviving traditional doctors among the Kiowa Indian Tribe. The individual sessions will free you of patterns of obsessive thought by facilitate healing of the deep emotional wounds. Call (913) 927-4281 to learn more or to schedule an individual session.

Finding the Source of Nourishment Within

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sun image
Pasha began to open up to me one day about the profound sense of emptiness she feels on the inside “…I often feel scared and restless, feeling as though I have to reach outside of myself for something in order to survive. I can’t explain what is it that I’m looking for, but I’m constantly searching and that creates a lot of stress and distraction in my life. I’m trying to find these moments of joy and happiness that prove to be elusive. I manage to grab onto them at times, but they never truly satisfy me. I always find myself wanting more, but more is either not available or never enough.”

I responded by saying “I wasn’t very conscious of my body until the trauma of my childhood and adolescence began to make its way to the surface during my mid to late twenties. Lots of things didn’t seem to be working in my life at that time. I was struggling to survive financially and my relationships were reflecting the traumas of my early life. And that was evoking lots of painful feelings.

Most people find a way to numb themselves or disconnect from the painful feelings. Escape routes never seemed to work for me. I found myself consumed by debilitating pain that was so intense and feared that I could go over the edge. I had an intuitive sense that I needed to breathe into the painful feelings.

I taught myself to go down into the middle of the feelings that arose during those times when my life didn’t seem to be working. I just kept breathing into the feelings and I continued to follow them as they went through their progression. The initial stages of the process were sometimes very difficult, but the discomfort would either break apart and come out of my body in waves, dissolve or dissipate. The process could take minutes, hours and sometimes even days, but I would keep breathing until I eventually came out the other side. I began to realize that no matter how intense or extreme the feelings became, that I would still be okay.

Pain became a doorway during those times in my life when nothing seemed to be working. The pain was excruciating, but at a certain point I could feel something breaking open. I would then feel these emanations flowing from within in the form of a warmth, vibration or tingling sensations. These emanations had a very nourishing and sustaining quality. I began to feel connected to something greater than myself as this presence grew stronger filling my entire body. At times I felt as though I had tapped into an eternal presence.

My sense of connectedness grew as I continued to work with this practice. Over time I began to feel this presence with me at all times. This presence became noticeably stronger when I began to work with this practice consistently.”

Does it really matter what we achieve?

Pasha then asked me if it really mattered what we achieved in this life.

“It’s important for us to find a balance. We’re living here in physical bodies on this planet and we all strive to meet basic needs for comfort and security. We need to be engaged with the world around us and to have some sense of purpose or direction. The things that we achieve in this world that are connected to the expression of our authentic selves facilitate growth and personal development.

We want to enjoy a certain quality of life and to some extent we are dependent upon others to meet our needs. And yet other people and our circumstances do not always work to our advantage. Even when they do, there are limits to the enjoyment or satisfaction we can derive through others.

Most of us are not with the love of our life. Our relationships are often not working the way we want them to. We may struggle financially. And we may encounter all kinds of hardships and difficulties along the way. Everyone and everything in this material world is transitory. Our bodies break down, we age and eventually die. Every one we ever know or love will leave or die. Everything that we build will eventually come down. Nothing will last forever. The only thing we have that continues is our own connection to the source.

We experience feelings of hurt, grief, loss, fear, anger and disappointment in response to the setbacks and losses we incur. Learning to “digest” our feelings enables us to maintain a healthy form of detachment. That will enable us to derive grater enjoyment from what we experience along the way.

We can learn to make a practice of taking whatever happens in our lives and using it as fuel for growth. Breathing into the feelings that surface when things do not seem to be going our way makes it easier for us to let go of what’s now working. We will become more receptive to new opportunities that come along. We will experience more peace within and find ourselves moved by a greater presence.”

Pasha was saying “I sometimes find it difficult to be fully engaged. I see other people working to their full capacity who are totally engaged in life. But with all that pain coming out I don’t feeling like doing much of anything.”

“The pain and stress held within often cause us to shut down or contract in ways that make it difficult for us to function. I didn’t feel like doing much of anything during the more difficult stages of the healing process. The sense of heaviness gradually became lighter as we continued to take the steps necessary to facilitate healing. The source of nourishment flowing from within creates the momentum that gives us a clearer sense of purpose and direction and compels us to be fully engaged.”

Pasha then said “I’m experiencing a lot of painful sensations in the low back and pressure in my head. Will this healing presence began to awaken and will I derive some sense of nourishment if I keep breathing into the feelings and sensations in these parts of my body? How would breathing into the painful sensations connect me with this source of nourishment?”

“Unprocessed feelings and other stresses held within can situate themselves in various parts of our bodies. The pain and stress that we hold within has a very numbing or deadening effect. Whole portions of our body-mind consciousness shut down and we lose touch with the innate healing power that resides within.

It’s important for us to let down our resistance by fully opening up to any pain or discomfort. We need to center our awareness in the middle of the pain and other forms of discomfort lodged in various parts of our bodies. Breathing softly and deeply with our attention fully immersed in the feelings and sensations activates the innate healing intelligence residing within. This healing intelligence helps us to dissolve and then digest the pain and stress held within various parts of our bodies.

Breathing into our feelings and bodily sensations awakens that innate healing intelligence that resides within. It also opens doorways that and that makes it possible for us to connect with a presence greater than ourselves. This presence will nourish and sustain us. We can greatly accelerate this process by working with a powerful healer.”

Pasha then asked me “What about people who are not going through a lot of pain? How can they connect to this presence within?”

I responded by saying “We all encounter adversity somewhere along the way. We may experience emptiness or boredom. We worry about our health, our financial security and the people who matter to us. We experience grief when the people we love and care about are no longer a part of our lives. We struggle to know what direction to go and feel unfulfilled in different aspects of our lives.

Breathing into the feelings and sensations that arise awakens the greater healing intelligence residing within. This will enable us to digest the stresses, connect to the authentic core residing within and tap into a greater presence.”

©Copyright 2013 Ben Oofana. All Rights Reserved. This content may be copied in full, with copyright, creation and contact information intact, without specific permission.

Ben Oofana is a healer who began his training with Horace Daukei, one of the last surviving traditional doctors among the Kiowa Indian tribe. The practices he teaches and individual healing sessions will enable you to heal and find the source of nourishment within. Call (913) 927-4281 to learn more or to schedule an individual session.